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Practice
of Dowry |
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In India, Dowry system that has
been prevailing amongst every
society and affected lives of
the people who are involved in
marriage and on those who are
around. |
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When Princesses of a dynasty got
married, the King offered, out
of overwhelming joy, a part of
his wealth and his State to his
Sons-in-Law in a grand wedding
function. His Ministers also
followed this regal practice as
a protocol. The public in
general, irrespective of rich
and poor, followed this showy
practice to maintain 'prestige'
and felt great at par with the
still rich society. |
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This dubious matrimonial
tradition however, seeped into
the homes of the poor and
downtrodden people to muster a
false respect. By then there was
already present a guilty
conscious feeling of giving
birth to and fostering of girl
children. Also the growing
percentage of female births over
male children contributed its
share to the corrupt system. The
fact that every home having more
girls than boys alarmed the
elders make hurry the marriage
of their daughters and created a
ground for competition. |
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The
Dowry system has recently become
so popular that every groom felt
proud and gaudy on the number of
items, weight of gold and amount
of money he received. |
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The parents of the girls too
sighed in relief over gifting
their sons-in-law with such
things. They relaxed indebted
because their daughters will be
well respected and best treated
by their in-laws, as compared to
their counterparts. |
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The daughters too take pride in
grabbing so much from their
parents and loose no opportunity
to highlight their material
superiority over other girls of
their position in the family
they enter. |
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The less adorned daughter feels
small of the situation and
either quarrels with her in-laws
or pesters her parents to give
her more so that she could also
gain equal respect in the family
of her husband. |
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Effects of Dowry |
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The aforesaid skirmishes within
the family engulf every member
and take shapes to different
dimensions, such as division of
families, separation of couples,
divorce, endless enmity, court
cases, loss of happiness, and
personal feud. |
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One could see the women acting
like enemies of women in almost
all the families while they
start the talk of marriage. The
boy's mother often makes the
entire family silent by one
sweep of her tongue in
bargaining for the money and
gold ornaments she would prefer
her daughter-in-law to bring in
and deposit with her. |
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A few mothers argue that they
too brought such things when
they got married and a few
rearrange the in-laws' ornaments
into a give-away dowry for their
own daughters, thus inviting
trouble and unwanted remarks
from the daughter-in-law and her
family. |
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Ponder over the plights of the
parents who cannot afford to pay
hefty dowry on Wedding that is
demanded from them
disproportionately, by the
Groom's family or by the Groom
himself. Due to the Dowry system
the marriage becomes burden. |
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The Demand of Dowry creates
hatred towards female child and
misguides the parents to kill
the female newborns, instigate
forcible abortions, develops
cracks in the unity of the
family, spoils good relationship
between couples, ends in enmity,
causes gas stoves to blow up,
and brings death to the young
brides |
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Dowry is not Male |
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Covetousness, fondness for easy
money, false prestige among
friends' circles etc. make a boy
to beg dowry from the girl's
parents. He doesn't realize that
he is selling himself by
behaving like a male-prostitute
for an amount disproportionate
to his status. |
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He behaves like an obedient
child, who never crossed the
line, any time drawn by his
parents, till he receives the
dowry in full. |
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The boy-turned-groom must
understand that easy money will
never give him uplift to his
life and he must be sensible to
look into the economical
standards of the girl's family. |
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Remember, you will always live
with a guilty feeling and you
can never truly possess what all
you have got as dowry. |
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What
Can you Do as a Parent |
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Any family, which goes to get
their boy married, must
understand that begging Dowry is
not an issue of prestige in the
society but a curse to them and
a sin committed by them. This
would definitely lower the
status of the boy and his
family. |
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The
relatives and in-laws must stop
passing awkward and degrading
comments taking a moral
responsibility to appreciate and
adjust with any shortfalls
resulting due to an expensive
and delicate new relationship.
Then only this devilish Dowry
demanding practice will be
curbed or routed out and many
unmarried will have their lives
simplified and scorn-free from
the in-laws. |
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While not opposing voluntary and
proportionate property given by
parents to and for their
children - newly wed couples,
everyone must abhor and oppose
Any Demand that is put forward
as a pre-condition for marriage. |
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All responsible parents must
encourage to discarding such an
evil practice and making humble
efforts towards the Noble Cause
of getting their children wedded
to live and lead a
happy-married-life, with peace
of mind. |
