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How to Save your
Marriage |
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Why do you think
relationships get bitter
to such an extent that
couples just want to run
away from them and want
to end everything? Why
do they want to forget
all the love that they
have for each other and
forget all the good
moments that they spent
with one another? Why
does their heart get
full of hatred and
dislike for one another?
Are you also facing such
a situation in your
relationship right now?
Well if you are then we
can help you out in
understanding and
solving this problem.
Remember one thing and
that is never run away
from your problems. Deal
with it and try to fix
things. Don't give up
and don't think it's the
end. A beautiful
relationship, a loving
partner and a trusted
husband is all a woman
can dream of so don't
just give in to the
problems and end
everything and then
repent all your life.
Try to save your
marriage and
relationship. |
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The
marital relationship is
a tug of war for power
and control. It is quite
natural for one member
of the relationship to
experience
disappointment, fear,
and worry if the other
member is dominant,
likes to rule and
doesn't give a damn
about your feelings and
thoughts. Anger will
then become the
predominant emotion,
which will envelop the
relationship leaving the
couple with a sense of
utter despair, confusion
and just feeling
hopeless. |
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At this point, many
couples think about
leaving the relationship
because they just can't
understand how to deal
with the situation for
many reasons; the most
common being ego, fear
of harm and
self-respect. The
impulse to run away is
paramount, but the
reality is you can not
run away from yourself.
It is essential that you
know what your part is
in the relationship that
makes it not work for
you. When each member of
the couple can face
their inner feelings and
behaviour patterns and
learns to take
responsibility for their
actions and behaviour
without blaming one
another, the couple has
the opportunity for the
marriage or relationship
to be repaired and
saved. |
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Ask your self a few Question |
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What made this conflict start?
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What was your role in it?
Sometimes unknowingly you do
trigger the conflict and
differences between you and your
husband. Though you think that
you had nothing to do with it
and it was his entire fault but
that's not the truth. When we
are angry we do say things that
hurt peoples self-respect and
ego. We may not realise it at
that moment but one harsh word
can really wreck things up and
create lot of problems. Though
we might think that our partner
deserved it but what we are
doing is instead of trying to
solve the problem we are simply
deteriorating it. So think about
this question when you have
cooled down and try to figure
out your mistake. Begin to think
about how you will begin to take
responsibility for your part in
the problem. |
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Do you listen to what your
husband is saying? |
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Sometimes conflicts arise when
you are too busy with your own
work or with kids and household
work that you seem to side track
your husband and not listen to
what he has to say. Men are very
sentimental and they love to
share their thoughts with their
partner be it about work, about
games or politics. The essential
aspect of a healthy relationship
is communication and listening
to one another. So ask yourself
this question and think do you
really give him time. |
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Find out what is your role in
triggering the problem/conflict
and list them. Work on changing
them one at a time. |
Sometimes we are too dominant,
aggressive, independent and we
think that we can never be
wrong. We are not ready to
accept our follies. Well that
can be wrong. So identify your
problems and weaknesses and jot
them down. Try to work on them
and try to talk with your
partner and share your feelings
about your responsibility and
your part in the problem. Don't
expect immediate results- Be
consistent and realistic in your
actions and reactions.
After answering these questions
if you think that you are stuck
and don't know what to do you
can take help from councellors.
But what ever you do remember
one thing that it is difficult
to get a loving and caring
partner so don't throw it away.
Try as hard as you can to save
your marriage and relationship
if you can and then if you think
it is slipping away then it is
definitely not your fault. Learn
to nurture yourself. Do things
that make you feel good both
physically and mentally. Making
behaviour and character changes
requires a great deal of energy;
therefore, what you need is
support from within and that
will happen only if you are
relaxed and calm. Do good thing
to yourself and try to love
yourself. |
